After Christmas, Mid February is always the next season I am fantasizing about. Not only is the world filled with red & pink hearts and the air could even smell like chocolate and rose, but also I was born in February, a happy Pisces who daydreams for the most time.
I spent the last valentine in NC with a girl friend and her valentine. We ate a box of chocolates she brought from England, sipped a bottle of wine, and then watched that all star movie “Valentine’s Day”. I wasn’t bothered with being single on that day because I believed in love. And I think everyone who believes love should not against such a special day, just because of the thought that everybody reminds you that you’ve been always taking care of yourself and how amazing that is. Until you have the very strong feeling that your heart is arrested by someone, always be expecting and enjoy chocolate on Valentine.
You will know when it comes. So did I.
I have class on Monday night, so the whole Valentine’s dinner thing is off the table. However, I wanted to make something special, so I planned a “Spice-Coated Rack of Lamb for Two”. However, my first time handling lamb rack involved discouraging and upsetting… He said I was a bit too harsh to myself and he would be just fine to have a bowl of noodle for dinner rather than being starved. And of course someone immediately burst into tears. The rest of the story could be skipped..
I am glad we talked and everything is fine now. I will keep learning and he will keep trying. After all, screwing up one dinner doesn’t make me less a good girl, right? :)
Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I have come to understand his love to me. It is not flower, sweet words, or things a normal girl would consider romance. It is care and support in both spiritual and material way. It is supporting me to pursue what I really want to do for life and not worry about the next bread. It is planning a dream life together now and future. It is making me content, grateful, and happy.
Oh, did I mention what I got for Valentine’s Day? A 16 Gegabyte SDHC card for my camera. So from now on, I could shoot 671 raw pictures in a row and stop worrying about the space limit! He had planned to give me a fancy Manfrotto tripod which might cost more than 10 times of a memory card, but I told him I want to wait for the best time to have it. He also told me that I will be crossing off things one by one along my wish list. I want to say thank you to him for always giving me the best he can.
There will always be a man like a father, a big brother, and even a little boy. I’m happy I find my valentine this year, and the years to come.